Most people that have spent more than a moment with me know I feel very strongly about Birthdays and the opposite about age.
Birthdays are a great way to explain the way the universe works. Time is an illusion to keep us from going insane. People can be so “overwhelmed” over such little things. We have a constant stream of news, services, art and culture being injected directly to us all the time, and they are so overwhelmed with that. Imagine what that person would do if they downloaded all of facebook at the same time. That is why it is important to understand the illusion of time. Drop a pebble into still water and observe be ripples on the water’s surface. At first they are all close together but then they move further out between each one in waves. That is what Birthdays are like. The first dozen or so all seem so close together for you, your parents, your family it is hard to tell them all apart. Once you become a teenager that is when you first see the gap. Teenage birthdays seems to be 13, 16 and 18. Then it’s 21, 25, 30, 40, 55 and so on.
My early Birthday’s rocked! I was raised in a big Catholic family in Chicago and seemed 4th of July was a great day to celebrate both our nation and my birthday. It is no wonder I have the self esteem I do with an entire nation setting off fireworks, grilling, playing music and overall being generally awesome! Then it suddenly went the other direction. The space between the waves moved our immediate family to Texas, my mother changed religions to one that claims birthdays are evil (that is how they interpreted The Bible) and as I got to my later school years I learned my Birthday was in summer. My Birthday became much less of a celebration.
That is probably why they have become such a big deal to me. Anyone that ever tells you it is not probably has an ulterior motive. It is about you every day. You are always as wonderful and special as you are on your Birthday, it is just that day it has become more socially acceptable to express it. Usually if I spend more than a moment with you I will remember your Birthday.
One thing I do not remember is age. Age truly is part of the illusion and the more you subscribe to it the more limits it has on you. As an actor I would be cast in roles and once directors learned my age they started limiting my roles to 5 years to my actual age. Then when I started teaching college I would often talk about credibility on the first day of class and the importance of independent thought. I never told the class my true age except for one semester. That turned into the most challenging class at that college. So I never reveal my age and in return I never remember anyone elses. It has become such an issue my mother and I had to do math and compare notes recently to determine what my official age was.
That all being said, today is my Birthday and I write this just as I pass through the official time of my birth. I usually give myself goals at the turn of the year and then for my Birthday since it is just past the middle. I am surprised and somewhat ashamed to report that I have not met and exceeded my goals. It seems as if I may be subscribing to age and time as the amount of work it takes to stay fit seems to become exponentially more challenging. I was hoping to be able to say I am in the best shape of my life, but instead I have to settle for the best shape I have been in since 2002. I do have a clean bill of health but now I have to be “checked up” on much more frequently. Doctors don’t seem to “fix” things anymore but rather tell me what is no longer under warranty and how to deal with it. Spiritually I feel I have grown a great deal and that is more about being and a lifestyle than a tangible goal. Professionally and in my career I feel as if I have exceeded goals. Guess I will have to adjust the goals accordingly.
shanespeare 